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Ready for a Playlist About Time Management? (Pencil it in.)

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Many of us feel that there just isn’t enough time in the day.

I first captured my observations about this common source of overwhelm (and the behaviors I observed) in the post The Ugly Truth About Time Management. The post starts with the premise that time issues begin with our own imperfect perspectives concerning time and value.

However, what resonates concerning improving time management varies across individuals. Luckily, there are quite a few TED speakers who have shared their take on the issue. They each offer a unique view of our ever-present tangle with time.

Here are 3 talks to help you to further understand your relationship relationship with time. (See the playlist at our channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPobAd0urxAGPaVu4PNWsIQ)

Greg McKweown. Essentialsm. Time and focus are highly interlaced topics. In his talk at Google, McKeown explores how we often hold ourselves back by having too many “good things” in our lives. The result? Even success can actually lead us down a cluttered path — and less, is often better.

Rory Vaden. How to Multiply Your Time. A self-discipline strategist, explains that everything we’ve learned about time management is likely wrong. From the 1950’s on, we have developed a view of time that doesn’t really help us become more effective. The problem? Time management requires us to consider a new, critical construct.

Laura Vanderkam. How to Gain Control of Your Free Time. Somehow when we must make something a priority, we suddenly have the time. Laura Vanderkam unpacks an interesting dynamic, that plays out day after day in our lives.

How do you manage time? Weigh in on the topic in comments.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Startup Life: How Being Employee No. 3 Was Definitely Worth the Risk

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Jumping from college to a start-up environment is no small feat for any individual. So, when we set out to find out what laid the foundation for Alyssa Patzius’ current path — we quickly realized that we had forgotten one key question; What was it like to be present at the earliest phase of a thriving organization’s existence? (Alyssa joined shortly after after Kelsey Raymond and John Hall started the company in 2011.)

Alyssa is Influence & Co’s VP of Client Success, where she oversees and supports the sales team, while developing big-picture strategies for growth. She has evolved through a number of roles at the organization, beginning with the title of Senior Account Strategist. But as you’ll find here, her family’s unique experience with risk  — was a career game-changer.

I’ve kept editing to the bare minimum in this post so you don’t miss a single note about her story. In this case we’ll start with a follow-up question right at the start.

Follow-up question: What was it like being employee #3?

Being employee #3 gave me an opportunity to be apart of the long-term vision of the company. The company is essentially just as much mine as the co-founders  — because I have really been there with them since the beginning. It gives me a sense of ownership that I wouldn’t have had otherwise.

I still remember every detail of all three of us sitting around a whiteboard trying to map out the future structure of the company. (Side note: We were completely off.) But as a 21 one year old, my input was being heard.

That would have never happened at any corporate job.

I also had to get comfortable very quickly with acting like I had been in certain situations when I never had. I took on the role of our first account strategist, working directly with clients. (Kelsey and John had been doing this in addition to sales and everything else founders deal with.) But there was no playbook and very few processes to rely on. I worked directly with CEOs of companies and I was seen as the expert in content.

That learned confidence is one of the key elements that I lean on as a female leader. It might get you into a corner every once in a while, if you haven’t done your homework. However, for the most part people do believe me and listen when I speak. I feel it all stems from those imperative learning years.

I also had to be mindful of burning out. We were working very long hours. Once we started to really pick up clients, I was working with 30 companies, plus hiring and training new account strategists to start to build our client services team. My job never stopped! (My now-husband, then boyfriend, said one day to me that I wasn’t actually with him. Even as we were watching TV, I was on my ever-present computer. I worked every night every night, and he was getting concerned. It was a real wake-up call that I needed to learn how to establish a balance.)

The following year I stopped working at nights, and become even more effective.  I valued my time — and when I was working during the day, nothing was going to distract me so I might enjoy my time at home. (I had to battle with feeling guilty knowing that my co-workers may be working all night while I wasn’t.) But over time, I began to see that I was much more effective. Two years ago, my Mom admitted that she really didn’t think the company would last. She was awesome though — and never told me she was skeptical. My brother-in-law took a risk to join a young startup, and he said he was comfortable jumping on board because he was so inspired by the success Influence & Co. has had over the years.

I love that not only that I owe so much to Influence & Co. for my professional development, but that my risk inspired other people to do what they love.

  1. What key factors came together that helped you to find your current path?

My career path may seem somewhat risky to an onlooker. However, looking back I feel like I made safe choices along the way.

When determining where I would go to college, I had my hopes set on doing something different from everyone at my public high school in St. Louis. I was determined to head out-of-state, but when push came to shove I wanted to study journalism. To say “no” to the best journalism school in the country, The University of Missouri, would have been detrimental. So I followed the crowd.

My father brought an internship opportunity to my attention during my senior year of college. One of his friends had a daughter who was looking to hire someone to help run an organization that supported local entrepreneurs. I really didn’t want to be the person who needed my father to set me up with an internship, so I didn’t pursue it initially. (I hadn’t needed him for opportunities prior, why should I need him now.0 However, I begrudgingly took the interview and immediately clicked with my new boss and landed to role.

As graduation approached, my grand plan was to land a sexy PR job in the big city. Instead — I took a role to stay with the startup I had been interning with where I went to college.

On one side, I see a path that leads me on a very direct/safe route. I haven’t strayed from journalism or content (or even Missouri). You can also look at the other angle and see someone who took the risk to graduate early, study abroad, take a job at a startup (with no guarantee of success) and a super low paycheck.

I’ve had to reflect on my career expectations for my early in my adulthood and recognize that I couldn’t ever have imagined what would come my way. I may have never left the state, but I took a risk and bet on myself, an idea — and the people around me.

Today, I am a senior leader at one of the fastest growing companies in America.

There is nothing safe about that.

  1. Did you have a mentor? A teacher, boss, relative, etc. — that impacted your career/life direction?

My mother and father have been imperative mentors throughout my life. At a young age, I watched my father leave a very lucrative role, because he didn’t believe in the culture and the way management was expecting him to treat his people. He had just moved our family back to St. Louis. Now he had to set out to start his own sales training business. My mother stayed at home to take care of the family. Despite being out of the workforce for some time — she was the backbone of the business and the family. She explained to us that we were taking a risk financially to start the company and how this might impact us. (We may have needed to move to another house.) Her continued transparency, helped me become comfortable with risk and taught me how to talk about finances. Over time, I came to idolize those who started their own businesses.

Fast forward: We did not have to move across the street. My father eventually sold his business. He is now the global sales manager for his largest customer.

Note: My mother is still the first person I call for management advice.

  1. None of us are perfectly suited for our own path. What aspect of your own personality or work style serves as an obstacle? How do you manage that challenge?

My gut feelings and instinctive decision-making skills, rarely let me down. It is one of my strengths. However, I have had to learn to slow myself down and think through every possible scenario to make the best decision. Snap decisions were necessary when we started Influence & Co., but today we have 75 employees. Communication around the why and how we make those decisions is crucial to buy-in across the company. If I cannot explain the rational thought process to my team — they could lose trust in me.

I have had the support of our co-founder, Kelsey (Meyer) Raymond, as I tackle this aspect of my personality. She has shown me that this was strength in crunch time . However, if we are proactive (and thinking ahead) there was no need to rely on gut or instinct. I learned that I was actually doing a disservice to my team — instead of feeling proud of being that “get shit done” person.

  1. If you had an observation concerning what separates those who love their work, from those who do not — what would that be?

An interview question that I discovered comes to mind.

Question to candidate: Tell me about something you love to do.

Follow up question: Why do you love the idea of working in [X Industry] for me?

You should observe if they speak with the same passion for both answers. f their eyes “light up” in the same way — they really want to work for you.

If people love what they do, they can’t stop talking about it. When my co-workers and I get together outside of work, we have to start the conversation off by saying “We aren’t going to talk about Influence & Co. today.” Thirty minutes later, someone has an idea for the business they want to throw out there.

  1. With success can come complacency. How do you draw energy from your successes and stay grounded. How do you stay sharp for what might come next?

Once you have tasted success — you never want to lose it. We have experienced 5 very successful years at Influence & Co. However, there is a real chance that the next year won’t be the same. If you become complacent, you become obsolete. It is much easier to be the underdog — than the giant.

I have had to become more comfortable facing the things that didn’t go well in my role or on my team. You won’t really absorb what defines that success for you, if you don’t remind yourself what it feels like to fail.

We have recently had a down sales quarter. It has been a hard few months learning how to pull my team out of that down-slump. I have analyzed the data, played scenarios over and over in my head and examined where I might failed my team as their leader. Just in these last weeks, sales are coming in at a fantastic rate once again. (I forgot how sweet it was, to ring the bell in my office that signals a close.)

If I didn’t make myself feel the failure, the sound of that bell wouldn’t feel nearly as great.

  1. In your world, what activities or tasks most energize you? What advice would you give to young women in college concerning finding the right career path?

Coaching my employees is the most energizing aspect of my role. Nothing makes me happier, than helping one of my sales team members think through how to approach a conversation or alleviate one of their leads hesitations in a genuine way.

Over the last two years I have moved into a sales management role. I started my own career in account management — working with clients directly and supporting those who worked with our clients.

I see so many women flocking to marketing and communications that could be fantastic in sales. (We are still trying to debunk the stigma of cold calling and aggressive cultures to attract women to the sales industry.) I really believe that women are the key to changing the image of sales. Plus, I have seen that women have so many of the characteristics that set people up for success in that role. They are self-starters, organized multi-taskers, great listeners, compassionate and good at building relationships.

I challenge young women to consider a career in sales.

I think they would be surprised how rewarding it really is. And who doesn’t like controlling your own paycheck?

  1. Lastly — what is your favorite book and why?

Shoe Dog by Phil Knight is my favorite book I have read this year. (It didn’t hurt that I read it in Costa Rica.) Shoe Dog tells Phil Knight’s story of how he founded Nike. As an athlete and sports buff, the business was the perfect combination of entrepreneurship and fitness. The book reads like a gripping story.

Once finished — I was inspired to get to work!

Thanks Alyssa.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the perfect gift. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

 

 

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Are You a Rebel? We’ve Got Some Sure Fire Ways to Harness Your Power

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By: Allison McLintick

I’m fairly sure that “rebel” is genetically encoded within my DNA — adjacent to the information about my brown eyes and auburn hair.

All my life, I have unconsciously felt the urge to go against the grain. I have a natural repulsion for the “herd mentality”, the pressure to pretend, play along . Even the “fake it to make it” idea, drives me to the brink.

I have tried these tactics — and sadly — it never ends well. Situations became quickly “combustible” or I would feel that I had compromised something very close to my core. Admittedly, this trait hasn’t always served me well. My youth and early adult life are littered with ill-judged decisions and (more than a few) burned bridges. It’s a testament to maturation.

I hadn’t harnessed my rebel nature — I was simply living in it.

As I refine my life design and focus on a conscious, elevated way of living, I have come to manage this source of personal power. The term “rebel” can now be accurately replaced with more productive labels such as “non-conformist” or may I venture to say — “genuinely confident”. (Even though as a rebel, I hate labels.)

If you are at all like me (and you are in need of advice), I have 4 tips to help you harness this potentially problematic wild streak into something powerfully dynamic.

Here you go:

  • Capture “you”. This exercise is imperative — choose 4 values, adjectives or catch-phrases that you want to use as a life compass and direct your attitude, decision-making and behavior against it. One caveat here. Try to keep it positive. Most “rebels” I know have robust opinions, but lack the focus to really stand for what truly matters to them. Time to figure this out. For example, personally I would want to become: 1) positively powerful, 2) enlightened, 3) perpetually curious and 4) a teacher of truths. I can fit my entire life into those 4 values.
  • Stand with confidence in what you are for — not just what you are against. Notice I said “confidence, not obstinacy, combativeness or defensiveness. No one is genuinely influenced by any individual who is notoriously negative.
  • Focus on mastering communication. Think communication is a “soft skill”? If yes, rebels will find a very tough road. Communication is the only route to influence. If you feel that internal drive to make your mark, you need to know the how/what/where/when and why’s of the written and spoken word. (Don’t worry, I can help. Message me with your most burning questions.)
  • Remember, no one owes you anything. There I said it. It is your life — and only you are accountable. “Rebels” are at their most powerful when they recognize this fact. In this way you can stand for your truths, while knowing you are crystal clear concerning where your accountability begins and ends. This insight will garner  boat loads of respect.

Not quite a rebel like me, but know someone who definitely is? Here are 4 tips to employ their greatest strengths, while helping them evolve.

  • Know that you can rely on them for the truth. Admittedly, the truth may be unsolicited. However, in many contexts, it can be a strength. We need to hear from people who will be forthright and transparent. However, gently remind them to be mindful of the situations where commentary and resistance are not appropriate.
  • They will likely not fear something different or even taking action. In my line of work, I see many people who are hesitant to make decisions, take risks or fail. “Rebels” generally, have more tolerance for this. Simply, give them some parameters and let them explore.
  • Many have a discerning eye for gaps. “Rebels” often resist what is expected, safe or the “norm”. So they often hold a perspective where they can see elements that can be improved . Find out what they’re thinking — and why. There may be a better path.
  • Engage them, but don’t expect them to change. My mind roughly functions the same way as it did when I was much younger. This is because my thinking processes are governed by enduring values. (They are certainly more refined.)

There are many “rebels” among us. I have come to love this part of my personality. It was a long haul — but I am loving my current space.

If you are a self-identified rebel, you can get there, as well.

Read more about it.* (Click on the photo to learn more)

 

Allison McClintick is a seasoned coach & speaker — specializing in influence and consciousness development. She’s a Mom of 2 (20 years & 6 years), a ridiculously talented house painter, lover of quantum physics and is currently pursuing a PhD in Psychology. To balance all that life, work and play — she’s attempting to “think” more effectively with practiced meditation. She’ll keep us updated.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Live Life at Your Own Speed (and No One Else’s)

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I often find myself wondering how social sharing might impact our lives. Highlight reels. Primped and posed. There are advantages, I suppose. Yet, how this ultimately affects well-being does weigh on my mind. We must remind ourselves to seek our own best life, not someone else’s. The pressure to seek what another might seek, could become deafening. As an individual who has always required a slower pace, more peace and more quiet — I’ll weigh in with some very simple advice: Be you.

We can lose ourselves, ever so slowly with a nod to please others. We might sense that others do not approve of what we enjoy (the slower road with the vegetable stand). Judge that other people’s paths — are somehow better than the path that is perfectly suited to us.

So — keep all of this in mind.

If you enjoy quiet moments in a garden, seek those spaces.

If you want to stay home, fight for your homebody status.

If you enjoy spaces filled with music and raucous celebration, find them.

If you enjoy the turn of a book’s page, make a date with that story.

If you feel compelled to absorb the smell, the lights and bustle of the city — open that window and breathe it.

If you seek secluded places, near salty ocean air, set your sights to reach them.

If you feel the need to slow down (or speed up) — block comparisons and refrain from judgements that somehow what you seek falls short.

Above all.

Live your life at your own speed.

And no one else’s.

Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an avid coffee drinker, blogger & occasional creative type. She is unwavering in her quest to help others respect their unique blueprint. Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the perfect fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Brands to Love (And Respect): Shea Moisture

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As a young widow of 19, Sofi Tucker sold her shea butter and skin salves to support her family in the Sierra Leone countryside. Years later, her grandchildren founded Shea Moisture — with a promise to ethically produce natural, organic products that love both people and communities.

In that vein, Shea Moisture founded Community Commerce, to support the people that source key brand ingredients — including training and infrastructure to ensure high quality goods and a fair price. In fact, 10% of Community Commerce sales give back to women-led businesses, the broader community and the Sofi Tucker Foundation.

The product line extends to moms, men, kids and babies. They offer skincare, haircare and cosmetics — all paraben free.  We like.

BTW, their products are also available at Ulta — if you’d prefer to touch & feel them, first hand. They also have an entire back-to school line. Just in time.

Here are a few of our favorites.

Shea Moisture’s Coffee Scrub: https://www.sheamoisture.com/raw-shea-butter-ground-coffee-scrub-restoring.html

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The Rich Earth Palette (The colors are simply beautiful): https://www.sheamoisture.com/sheamoisture-cosmetics-rich-earth-palette.html

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Shea Moisture Lipsticks: https://www.sheamoisture.com/products/cosmetics/lip.html

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Men’s Shave Line: https://www.sheamoisture.com/products/men.html?product_collection=405&cat=102

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The Manuka & Honey Collection: https://www.sheamoisture.com/products.html/?product_collection=251

Manuka Honey Collection

Are you fan of Shea Moisture? Share your favorite products in comments.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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3 Talks About Life (and Risk) That Will Encourage You to “Show Up”

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Putting yourself out there is rarely easy.

Whether you are considering a life or career move — taking that risk and showing up for your dream can be a struggle. Even when we know the path is what you desire. As human beings, it is simply a natural instinct to circle the wagons and protect ourselves.

However, as protection can potentially control our losses, it can also limit our forward progress. Whitney Johnson aptly talks about this iconic dilemma in her HBR post: Always, Always, Always Show Up. (To be honest, her post could have saved my psyche had it been published earlier — when I realized LinkedIn’s Influencer Program included a “follow” button.)

When we guard ourselves too vehemently — we can miss the moments that just might matter.

Here are 3 talks to help you grapple with these emotions and argue with yourself more effectively. (You can also see the playlist at our channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPobAd0urxAGPaVu4PNWsIQ)

Hoping you decide to show up!

Brene Brown at 99U: Your critics are not the one’s who count.
It’s tough to create. But, your critics shouldn’t be the loudest voice in your head.

Alison Legerwood: Getting stuck in the negatives.
Dr Legerwood discusses how our past experiences predispose us to remain in a “loss” mindset — and how we need to change that dynamic.

Whitney Johnson: Personal disruption is a mindset.
Whitney honestly asks herself, “Did I really show up, did I really take my dream on?”

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Building a Company in Your 20’s: An Interview with Influence & Co.’s Kelsey Raymond

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We are thrilled to have landed this interview with Kelsey Raymond, co-founder and president of Influence & Co — an agency built on the belief that great content has the power to build an individual’s presence. Kelsey started this journey shortly after college in 2011 and navigated a wide range of challenges, peaks and valleys. (You’ll likely see yourself in her journey). She has most generously shared some of these moments with us and some solid advice — so we might learn from her experiences. (BTW, the topic of confidence does come up.)

As a team, Influence and Co. is committed to “keep it real”. They develop an individual’s presence authentically, through crafted content that retains a true voice —  transforming a client’s knowledge base and experience into credibility. Their work is rooted in a “sharing not promotion” vantage point, where their clients offer something meaningful to their potential audience. This action in turn, could serve as fertile ground for a future relationships. (They really intended to leave the whole “ghost-writer” concept buried in the dust.)

Like many successful leaders, Kelsey has a firm belief in mentors and mentoring — along with a strong strategy to invest in people. She relishes the opportunity to help others grow within Influence & Co’s culture.

I have always loved the fact that she employs so many great journalists many from the mid-west. (I’m a Detroiter.)

Who says that you have to be on the coast to rock a start-up?

I’ve watched this group grow over the years — and I couldn’t be more excited for them. Since 2011, Influence & Co has grown from 2 to 70 members, earning a coveted place on the Forbes Most Promising Companies in America list.

Outstanding.

As a note, I’ve barely edited Kelsey’s responses to our questions. (I didn’t want you to miss a thing and honestly, I couldn’t really improve upon a journalist’s unfolding story.) If require guidance in building influence through content, learn more about Influence & Co. by visiting their site here:

  1. What key factors came together that helped you to find your current path?

There were a few factors that led/helped me to start & run my current company, Influence & Co.

  • Family Influence: First, I was raised in an entrepreneurial family. My Dad ran a real estate business (as did my sister) and my brother ran a music venue. I grew up knowing that entrepreneurship was a valid career path — not some kind of crazy dream.
  • School: At the University of Missouri I studied Marketing & English, but the majority of my knowledge base came from my experience with an Entrepreneurship club called “The Entrepreneurship Alliance” (EA). Through this group, I was able to meet with entrepreneurs, pitch ideas, win seed money and start a business with a friend.
  • Testing Entrepreneurship as a Path: Because of EA, I was able to start a small marketing company. We learned much about sales, writing contracts, good customer service, and even hiring and firing employees. It empowered me to feel confident to start another company after college.
  • Mentors: More on this below!
  1. Did you have a mentor? A teacher, boss, relative, etc. — that impacted your career/life direction?

Absolutely! I’ve been incredibly fortunate to have two fantastic mentors in my life.

  • My Dad, Jerry Meyer — He was my first mentor and taught me a lot of what I know about managing people (treating them right) and a good work ethic. Throughout my career, I’ve been able to ask him for advice — knowing that even though our companies are very different, he understands people and what truly matters.
  • My Entrepreneurship Alliance Professor, Dr. Greg Bier: Greg introduced me to the world of entrepreneurship through EA and has been an incredible support system to me throughout my career. He challenged me, supported me and most impactfully – he opened doors. He introduced me to the people who would become my first clients, my first investors, and even my first employees. Oh and he introduced me to my husband. Greg was the officiant at our wedding in May.
  1. None of us are perfectly suited for our own path. What aspect of your own personality or work style serves as an obstacle? How do you manage that challenge?

One aspect of my personality that did serve and currently serves as an obstacle is insecurity. I was 22 when I started Influence & Co. — and I would frequently feel like I didn’t have the right to be in the position I was in (imposter syndrome big time).

Mentors in my life have helped me build confidence. However, it is still something I struggle with. One thing I have started to manage this (which may sound incredibly cheesy) — is to remind myself that I have earned the recognition I’ve received. That I have worked very hard — and that I have earned the right to be in the room or conversation or at the table (wherever that might be).

Literally saying these things out loud — helps me overcome an insecure moment.

I’ve also realized that my expressed confidence helps other young women on our team gain their own confidence, so I can help them.

  1. If you had an observation concerning what separates those who love their work, from those who do not — what would that be?

One thing I do notice, is that people who don’t love their work, frequently do not enjoy the people they work with. Even the most tedious jobs can be enjoyable if you’re working with people you genuinely enjoy being around. For this reason we invest a lot of time in the interviewing process to make sure we are hiring people who we will enjoy working with.

  1. With success can come complacency. How do you draw energy from your successes and stay grounded. How do you stay sharp for what might come next?

It’s all about what motivates you. What motivates me is helping companies connect with their audience on a human level (which helps grow our client base) and creating jobs for the most people possible, so that they enjoy coming to work every day (which means growing our team).

With those two things being motivators, it’s not difficult to avoid becoming complacent. I don’t have a 5 year goal of numbers I’d like to hit — it’s more about continuous growth and improvement.

  1. In your world, what activities or tasks most energize you? What advice would you give to young women in college concerning finding the right career path?

The activity that energizes me, is working with people to help them come to their own conclusions – so in a sense, coaching my team members. I’m thrilled that as we’ve grown, I’ve been able to spend time on this. However, it didn’t start out that way.

The advice I would give to young women in college concerning finding the right career path, is to think about something you’d love to be doing five or ten years from now – talk to someone who is in that role, and ask them what skills, experiences and responsibilities you need to have developed over that 5 years to get there.

Don’t discount the importance of understanding financials if you want to be in management, don’t discount the importance of meeting deadlines – realize how each of those things will help you get to where you want to go.

  1. Whose life or career do you most admire? Why?

I admire Sheryl Sandberg – I’ve just finished reading her book Option B — and admire her resilience and attitudes toward life. I’ve also read Radical Candor by Kim Scott, and she tells a few stories about Sheryl as a boss at Google. I was simply floored by how Sheryl was described as a boss. From Kim’s stories, she seems to have the perfect combination of empathy and willingness to provide critical feedback. She earns the trust and respect of those she supports.

  1. Lastly — what is your favorite book and why?

Such a hard question!! Since my list of favorite all time books is much too long, I’ll go with my favorite from the last two months, “Who Thought This Was A Good Idea?” by Alyssa Mastromonaco.

Thanks Kelsey. I know I learned a lot.

Please note: Don’t miss our interview with Influence & Co.’s employee #3 — Alyssa Patzius,Vice-President of Client Experience — as she explains what it’s like to be a part of a growing start-up.

The Tilbury Edit shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the fragrance. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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It’s Friday: Time For a Playlist About How to Manage Yourself

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It’s Friday. If you’ve had a challenging week, I’m sure you are grateful it’s over. One thing I can attest to: when things are challenging, we require strategies to manage ourselves. Whether you have run amuck with a mountain of negative thoughts or you’re just plain feeling stuck — listening to experts sharing their research and perspectives — can help us re-frame our own challenges.

This week we’ve picked our favorite videos to help you through the rough patches and offer a boost. Click on the link to our YouTube channel. Then scroll through to the “How to Manage Yourself” playlist. Happy viewing.

Link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPobAd0urxAGPaVu4PNWsIQ

Here are our picks:

  • Developing a Growth Mindset. Psychologist Carol Dweck reminds us that potential has much to do with our own perspective.
  • How to Make Stress Your Friend. Health Psychologist Kelly McGonigal talks about stress and the beliefs that we hold about it.
  • True Grit: Can Perseverance Be Taught. Angela Duckworth lets us know that intelligence is a much smaller part of the story where achievement is concerned.
  • Mindy Kaling’s Advice for Young Girls. Actress Mindy Kaling tells us to focus on your art — not the aspects of you that you feel will hold you back.
  • Getting Stuck in the Negatives (and How to Get Unstuck). Social psychologist Alison Ledgerwood touches on how we are overwhelmingly affected by negative information — and what it takes to get unstuck.

Do you have a favorite video to add to this list? Let us know.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the perfect gift. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Why Suits Don’t Always Make the Woman & Other Clothing Tales

Lynda_Carter_Wonder_Woman

By: Allison McClintick

The other night over cocktails, my friend and I were discussing how clothing can change how you feel. Interestingly, she almost fell out of her chair — gushing over the glorious power trip of a perfectly tailored suit. She smiled slyly at me, sharing her glorious secret; that the suit made her feel like a bad ass.

I really couldn’t share her enthusiasm.

There are few things in life I detest more than wearing a suit. Well, that may be a slight exaggeration. But not by much. What you wear, should be an extension of your personality. If you feel powerful in a suit, it should follow that it fits your personality (and you are not trying to compensate for something else).

The suit “thing” just does not follow for me.

One thing I have learned, when it comes to clothing that helps you feel confident and empowered — it is not a one-size fits all solution.

I have spoken in front of thousands of people. Once or twice, I have been criticized for not wearing a traditional jacket (ironically, by other women). I intentionally stopped wearing them because when I did, I felt uncomfortable — a little like a fraud. I was actually physically uncomfortable, like a child trying to pass as an adult. It totally threw me off.  My brand and my message said something totally different than what I was wearing.

Formal career wear? It just doesn’t suit me. I’ve instead opted for dressy jeans and a much for forgiving form of the “jacket” (No complaints yet. See a couple of anti-suiting options below). I let potential clients know this is how I present myself, from the start.

It is no surprise that formal suiting doesn’t work for me. I’ve been an athlete all my life. I’ve played soccer for 30 years and when exercising, I’m already planning my next workout. I practically live in yoga pants — immediately putting them on when I get home. You can only imagine my euphoria over “athleisure” earning a permanent place in the trend world.

For those of us who are dedicated athleisure fans — we know that it isn’t just a trend — it’s a lifestyle. It represents active living, a casual sense of adventure. I like to think it represents a natural sense of confidence. However like anything, there needs to be balance. In my Atheleisure efforts of yesteryear, I may have looked a bit too casual. In the last few years, I’ve evolved to choose functional, flattering options.

Flattering and functional do cost more — just as it would with a well cut suit. If your mid-weight jogging/errand jacket gives you hypothermia in a rain shower in late June, you’ve missed the mark. Brand up. I have my favorite, classic brands. However, there are many new brands jumping into the mix — many with a social conscience — that will help you feel better about spending $100 to knock around town.

Bottom line: Choose what you wear for every situation with intention. Whether at work or play.

Explore quality options that fit you and serve you well. Be mindful of your contextual expectations; however, compromising your unique brand should not be an option. You won’t feel right, you won’t “seem” right and life is too short to feel uncomfortable.

If you’re feeling the Atheleisure vibe (as I do), I’d like to share a couple of favorite brands to try. Those mentioned, qualify as brands you should love & respect.

Be your own woman. Be yourself. Feel empowered to be you.

Athleta. With a refreshed commitment to sustainability, fair trade and empowering women, Athleta provides a wide array of items that could be worn at work or play. We’ve picked a couple of jacket alternatives. They also have a travel line — that can take you just about anywhere. Find it here.

Athleta Bomber
Athleta Stronger Bomber Jacket


Sweaty Betty.
I love this brand’s versatility and classic sense of style (with an edge). A real plus — they support the Movemeant Foundation, a non-profit designed to address women developing a positive body image.  Find their site here:

SweatyBetty
Enso Cullotes + Simhasana Sweatshirt

Have a favorite athleisure brand that gives back? Share it in comments.

Allison McClintick is a seasoned coach & speaker — specializing in influence and consciousness development. She’s a Mom of 2 (20 years & 6 years), a ridiculously talented house painter, lover of quantum physics and is currently pursuing a PhD in Psychology. To balance all that life, work and play — she’s attempting to “think” more effectively with practiced meditation. She’ll keep us updated.

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the perfect gift. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.

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Want a Better Career? Examine Your Daydreams

Daydreamjpg

Career exploration really begins within our own imaginations — long before we utter a single word or visit a job site.

The dynamic is often a very quick exercise within our mind’s eye. However, it is a vital step in the career growth process. How we visualize our future matters. When you envision your future. What do you see? An expanded role? Success in that role? Failure?

I happened to be reading an article about mindfulness yesterday — particularly discussions about carving out space between a stimulus that we might encounter, and our reaction to it. (See a discussion of the one-second rule here.) Research has revealed that taking a moment to suspend making a decision, forming an opinion or choosing a behavior, can have a significant impact upon our work lives.

That had me thinking about what we envision as we consider our own abilities or potential in the future.

Conventional thinking tells us that all human beings seek pleasure and avoid pain. Yet, research has shown that our own regulatory focus — or the way we typically approach risk — plays a role. Some of us are more naturally promotion focused and embrace more risk; others choose a safer path and are more naturally prevention focused. (Read more about that here.)

So, when you daydream about other paths, do you dismiss yourself too quickly? Pass over a path that may be fruitful long-term, because of a concern about the risk?

Do you have moments when you consider yourself in a non-reactive way? Moreover, is it possible that a prevention focus holds you back?

We cannot build fantastic career paths, if we cannot fully consider all of the possibilities. Yes, there are inherent risks. However, we can become aware of our reactions to those risks and manage the associated fear.

If you respond with an immediate “nay” when contemplating a pivot or challenge, be mindful of your own natural tendency in that regard. When you pause at that window of possibility — envision yourself succeeding, not drowning — and see what that brings. If possible, be aware of an overactive drive to prevent failure.

I challenge you to hold on to the possibilities just a bit longer.

What steps will you take to help make those dreams a reality?

Do your daydreams help or hinder you? Share your perspective.

Read more about it:

Live.Work.Think.Play shares observations concerning a wide array of topics from running a company — to the perfect gift. It is designed to share lessons learned from a variety of perspectives.